Friday, September 11, 2009

Total Incompetence

1. Qualified / Competent – This is someone who is qualified to do the job they are in, and competent at it.

2. Unqualified / Competent – This is someone who is not qualified to do the job they are in, but competent enough to do it.

3. Qualified / Incompetent – This is someone who is qualified to do the job they are in, but is not competent at the job.

4. Unqualified / Incompetent – This is someone who is not qualified to do the job they are in, and is not competent at the job.

I like 1’s and seek them out in life.

I like 2’s and often admire their enthusiasm and ambition.

I loathe 3’s, they are often the cause of great emotional pain and human suffering.

I avoid 4’s, they are often charlatans and can be very dangerous.

I have sniffed out a 4 in my camp. I am taking counsel. I make ready to execute.

This person presented as a 1. After a bit of human due diligence was rated a 2. After working together, went directly to 4.

It has been a waste of many people’s time. I have been hoodwinked. I do not like making errors in judgement of this nature, it occasionally happens. I am human.

I will pull the trigger today.



Corinne said...

Eek! I kinda feel sorry for the incompetent one, though they may have asked for it....

In the military we had to use the 1-4 diagram to figure out counseling and training techniques, because unfortunately we couldn't kick people out so easily. There's nothing more trying than attempting to bring an unmotivated, unqualified, incompetent person up to par.

ian in hamburg said...

I had a number 5 in the newsroom in Hong Kong. She was unqualified, incompetent, and a be-itch to boot.

jinjir minjir said...

You've got email.

Anonymous said...

i've pulled the trigger. uncomfortable? sure. morale-lifting for everyone else? hells yeah!

i would add a 5th category - incompetent and unaware of it. these people simply can't be fixed because they are incapable of seeing that they are failing to execute. these folks need to be shipped to small islands in the pacific...

Return to Norway said...

Vexing......... Aim and shoot.

Michele said...

Ouch! Never a nice situation to be in. Hope the execution went as planned and you are recovering from the effort.

I have worked with 1 through 4 and both #5s (as described by Ian and Daisyfae) and that is why I enjoy "The Apprentice U.K." so much.

I'm definitely a 2. I usually get a job by accident of circumstance and then work my butt off.

Anonymous said...

"small island in the pacific" daisyfae?

Tasmania perhaps?

The Daily Reviewer said...


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beaverboosh said...

corinne - ja, like the government here

ian - bitch in not a 5, it is a second dimensional overlay - worked with a lot of 1s that were bitches but 4's as bitches, whoa, too hard to cope with

jm - i know, i have iexlporer and ppt too

df - too right girl! hey see comments for ian - unawrenes is a second dimension also, I have worked with 1's that are totally self unaware, but a 4, put an electic fence around the small island in the pacific and make sure it is in shark infested waters

caroline - vexing is such a great word... it is done

michele - i bet you a great 2, you must have a really small butt

nm - too big, lets make it tahiti,they are all french c***ts there anyway... see note to df re: electric fences... make note to order more people eating sharks

the daily review - Thank you! Oh! Thank you! I can hardly conjugate verbs! I feel so horny! And this award - it's so suspiciously phallic! Oh, thank you again! I just want everyone to bow down before me and accept that even in my wildest hallucinations, I never would have fantasized that this could ever validate my mediocrity. And to the other brilliant bloggers, I want each of you to know how totally mega-pumped your plastic surgery makes me feel right now!

You know when they first told me I was not the father, I just had to take a Xanax and laugh about how freakish my thighs have been. I guess it all just makes me feel kinda numb.

You know, there are so many blood-sucking two-faced harpies to thank! First off though, I want to bitch slap the self-congratulatory circle jerks of the The Daily Review, who looked deep within their cold, black hearts before giving me this fantastic award! Also, I want to thank my guru, for being such a powerful force in my kitchen. And to the People Under the Stairs, who taught me to take life by the fifth of bourbon. And finally, to all the personal assistants I fired - I couldn't have done it without you!

Thank you. Thank your.

Zhu said...

I think there is nothing wrong with unqualified/ competent, since most people learn fast if given a chance.

beaverboosh said...

zhu - some of my favy people are unqualified and competent

Shantanu said...

Well, well, among the Top 100 Blogs! Congratulations. :)

beaverboosh said...

shant - hey thanks but really, is this sort of stuff meaningful, you know next to the most excellent relationship you and I have forged over the years together in blogsphere... hahahahahahaha... cheers mate!