Tuesday, January 1, 2008

Brewery Takes The Piss

Another most excellent yuletide in Norway has now passed and the local brewery has connected an extraction unit to my penis to (re-)bottle a special 2008 New Year's brew. To be honest, I've only taken to drinking my own urine in emergencies, but this year's vintage shows great promise.

The yuletide season here in Norway is magical and starts on the 24th of December. We dress in traditional National Dress (Bunad), and after our feast, hold hands and sing and dance around the xmas tree. It is like living in Whoville but without the Grinch.

Mrs. Beaverboosh and I have not started a family yet, so it is principally an adult affair, sans any little shits. Don't get me wrong, I love children, though I couldn't eat a whole one.

New Year's Eve is especially exciting as thousands of totally pissed members of the public ignite industrial military grade fireworks at the stroke of 12. These weapons are unavailable in any other country I have visited but to professionals. Here you buy them in the corner shop.

We are in the mountains, on a ski hill, so positioning before midnight is always tricky. It's like being in a firefight in Iraq... with snow, champagne and lots of hugging and kissing, ... and some falling over... and the occasional 3rd degree flesh wound or loss of sight!

It's all very merry, really!


Only 4 more days to the 5th and our 12 days of xmas will be over for another year. I am hoping the brewery will dispatch their man promptly to disconnect the apparatus.

Here is hoping that 2008 is your best year ever!

Beaverboosh

10 comments:

Zhu said...

Looks like end of the year festivities are taken quite seriously in Norway!

Well, in cold countries, not much to do but drink to forget you're cold. Look at Russia... :D

Happy... what already... oh, Yuletide?

Pomgirl said...

Happy New Year!

nursemyra said...

they sell fireworks at the corner shop in new zealand.

even the sheep can buy them if they've got the cash

Jonny said...

Sounds like my kinda X-mas! I forgot to buy the pinetree-smell on box as I promised to myself... so I was left with the same charming neon light x-mas tree as last year...

Don't you know that X-mas lasts until Easter in Norway, ref the song? I'm sure Mrs Beaver can confirm!

Jonny said...

Don't you know that X-mas lasts until Easter in Norway? Ref that song... I'm sure Mrs Beaver can confirm!

I promised myself to buy pinetree-smell on box this year for our little neon light tree... but forgot/couldn't find! Our X-mas palmtree outside also failed to put me in that same Norwegian X-mas spirit!

Qelqoth said...

When you resort to drinking your own piss to get drunk, that's when you know you're totally fucking hardcore.

Cool site. I'll blogroll it.

beaverboosh said...

Nursemyra - you mean there are actually people in NZ?

Johny - Close you eyes, sniff some pine tree scratch and sniff and think of Norway, that should do it! I am still singing!

Qelqoth - dude, if you get your hands on a bottle of this stuff try it. Tastes exactly like american beer!

Qelqoth said...

It's tough to get hold of Canadian beer in the United Kingdom.

But as you implied this beer you're on about is an healthy alternative to the likes of Coors and Miller, I guess I'll keep looking.

beaverboosh said...

Zhu & Pomgirl, apologies for the problems with Blog Comments!

Zhu - too true, though my time around the equator seemed to involve not much to do but drink to forget the heat!

Pomgirl - Happy New Year to you and the Boy. Good luck on the wicked weed!

Qelqoth - no doubt mate. Has the nose of a London Pride and a palat of an IPA, possible Greene King

TorAa said...

You are right, Norwegians are good to find opportunities for a fiest, even outside in the dark and cold winter.

Great post